We Bought a House to Knock Down — Here's What We Wish We Knew

When Ash and I first talked about building our own home, we were sitting in a rental on the Central Coast thinking "how hard can it be?" We were 24. We had savings. We had YouTube. We had absolutely no idea what we were about to get into.

Spoiler: it's been harder than either of us expected. But it's also been one of the best decisions we've ever made. This post is the honest version — the version I wish someone had written before we signed on that house in Lake Haven.

Why We Chose a Knockdown Rebuild

We looked at buying new. We looked at building on vacant land. But the numbers kept pointing to one thing: buy an old house on a decent block, knock it down, and build exactly what we want. In Lake Haven, 2263, that math worked out. The existing house was a 1970s fibro — three bedrooms, one bathroom, original everything. The block was what mattered: 620 square metres, flat, north-facing rear yard. Perfect.

The plan was simple. Buy it, demolish it, build a four-bedroom home as owner-builders, and save a fortune by managing the trades ourselves instead of paying a builder's 20-30% margin. Simple on paper. Less simple in reality.

The Asbestos Surprise That Nearly Broke Our Budget

Here's something nobody warns you about with a KDR: old houses in NSW are almost certainly full of asbestos. We knew the fibro walls might contain it. What we didn't know was that the eaves, the bathroom tiles, the vinyl flooring, the laundry lining, and even the fence had asbestos in them.

Our demo quote came back at $45,000. We'd budgeted $25,000. That's a $20,000 hole in our budget before we'd even started building. The asbestos removal alone was $18,000 because it requires licensed removalists, air monitoring, and disposal at a certified facility. You can't just skip it — it's a legal requirement in NSW and the fines are enormous.

Ash was furious. Not at me — at the situation. She'd flagged the asbestos risk early on and I'd brushed it off with "it'll be fine, it's just the walls." She was right. It wasn't just the walls. Lesson one of owner-building: when your partner says "have you checked that?" — check it.

Council Approvals: The Delay Nobody Warns You About

We went the CDC (Complying Development Certificate) route because everyone told us it was faster than a DA. "Two to three weeks," our private certifier said. "A month tops."

It took eleven weeks. Eleven. The certifier needed a bushfire assessment (Lake Haven is BAL-LOW but they still needed the report). Then the stormwater plan needed revision. Then the setback calculations needed re-checking because our block has an irregular rear boundary. Every time we fixed one thing, another appeared.

During those eleven weeks, our demolition contractor had a scheduling gap that would have been perfect. By the time the CDC came through, he was booked out for another six weeks. That one delay cascaded into nearly four months of lost time.

The Nightmare Neighbour

I'm not going to name names. But we have a neighbour who has made this build significantly harder than it needed to be. Complaints to council about our skip bin placement. Complaints about the temporary fencing. A letter to the certifier questioning whether our setbacks were correct (they were). An argument about a tree near the boundary that — we later confirmed with a surveyor — is entirely on our property.

Ash handles this better than I do. She keeps records of everything. Dates, times, what was said, photos. Her approach is "don't engage, just document." My approach was initially more... heated. Hers works better. If you've got a difficult neighbour, document everything and respond only through official channels. Don't let them live in your head rent-free.

What We'd Do Differently

If we started over tomorrow, here's what would change:

Would We Do It Again?

Honestly? Yes. Even with the asbestos bill. Even with the council delays. Even with the neighbour. The alternative was paying a builder $450,000+ for a house we could build for $320,000 by managing the trades ourselves. That's $130,000 in equity we're creating. At 25, that's life-changing money.

But I wouldn't recommend it to someone who doesn't like problem-solving. Owner-building isn't a paint-by-numbers thing. It's messy, stressful, and there are days when you wonder why you didn't just buy an apartment. Then you see the slab go down and suddenly it all makes sense again.

This blog is our build diary. We'll be writing more as we go — the wins, the losses, and the stuff nobody else talks about. If you're thinking about doing a KDR as an owner-builder, stick around. We're learning everything in real time and we're not going to pretend we've got it all figured out.

Because we definitely don't.